Descriptions We Could Do Without

Soft as Baby's Puke

Descriptions We Could Do Without

Shaking like a wet chihuahua with Parkinson's.

SOC Funnies 3

SOC Funnies 2

SOC Funnies 1

Do It Yourself Sci-Fi Movie: Just Add Actors and Scenery

"That transmission isn't coming from Earth!"


"This wasn't built by human hands!"


"We're entering a black hole!"


"Professor!"


"It's some sort of mechanical man!"


"Man was not meant to play god!"


"It's some sort of genetic experiment gone horribly wrong!"


(Sound effects) BLEEP-BLOOP, whirrrrrr......click


"Prepare for light speed jump!"


"You mean....we're not the first life form on this planet?"


"It's some sort of atomic mutation!"


"How can you speak English?"


"On Earth we call this 'kissing'."


"Their technology is centuries beyond ours!"


"You can't go out there without a helmet!"


"Prepare for blast off!"


"I-am-programmed-to-serve-you."


"Meteor shower!"


"Now sample a taste of my Death Ray!"


"I speak as a representative of the other planets."


"The computer has become self aware!"


"We come in peace." (Sound effect) KABOOM!!!


"It's a flying saucer!"


"It's a giant egg!"


"But what powers it?"


"We're headed straight for the Sun!"


"Turn on the artificial gravity."


"Help me strap on my jet pack!"


"Careful! They have ray guns!"


"This ship is atomic powered!"


"Does your planet no longer experience love?"


Theremin: oooo-WEEEEEE-OOOOHHHH-oooo

Do It Yourself Horror Movie: Just Add Actors and Scenery

"This looks like a good place for a midnight swim!"


"Hey! I think I felt something brush against my leg!"


"Slide on over here, baby!" "Johnny! Did you hear something?"


"Lock the door! LOCK THE DOOR!!"


"Don't touch me! DON'T TOUCH ME!!"

"My hand! MY HAND!!"


"It's coming closer! CLOSER!! CLOSER!!!"


"No! NO!! NOOOOO!!!"


Pretty much anything repeated three times with increasing emphasis; for example:
"Jelly donuts! JELLY DONUTS!! JELLY DONUTS!!!"


"The room is covered in.... blood!"


"Are those....teeth marks?"


"The whole house smells of rotting flesh!"


"Those tracks weren't made by anything....human!"


"Good Lord!" (Sound effects) Gasp! Choke!


"Is that a slime trail?"


"My god! It doesn't have a head!"


"What the hell is that thing?"


"His flesh! It's MELTING!"


"Something made him explode...FROM THE INSIDE!"


(Sound effect) Drip!-Drip!-Drip!


"My god! It's horrible!"


"It's like a ______ (pick an innocuous creature of your choice), only of incredible size!"


"Are those HUMAN bones?"


"He looks like he's been chewed to pieces!"


"It's inconceivable that a human body could be stuffed into a space that small!"


"I think we've managed to get awa..hhhmmmmmpppphhh!!"


"...and so the world is safe....(turn to camera) FOR NOW!"


THE END?


Heartbeat sound: ba-BUMP! ba-BUMP! ba-BUMP!